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  • Writer's pictureRay Chen

Stress or Relax?

Updated: Mar 18, 2023

We are often presented with a choice at every moment. Do we respond with stress or do we relax?

The decisions we make in life are far more complex and multifaceted than these two choices. However, when we are challenged or when opportunity arises we can generally respond in these two ways.

Let me explain.

For example, if you are unsure about a particular job that you are in and are contemplating leaving. This can often bring about immediate stress and worry about how you are going to be supported financially and your career path. In these situations you actually have a choice to relax.

Do not allow yourself to go down a stress spiral about all the negative things that may happen. This negativity bias is not beneficial and can be a barrier to your ability to make a rational decision. A decision that truly signifies what you want.

Mindfulness through living in the present and taking it one step at a time is key.

Breathing is your best tool when tackling challenging situations. If you learn to control your breathing during times of unrest or turmoil you can align your body with your mind. You allow yourself to face any problem with clear eyes and an open heart.

Relaxing does not mean avoiding the problem altogether. In the context of leaving a job it may just be an initial mindset shift. The initial stress reaction is not helpful and once you can stop the stress cycle you can open to the reality that things are ok in the present. Making the decision to react with openness and positivity helps reduce the fear response.

You will obviously need practical steps to minimise stress and ensure the best possible outcome for yourself and those you love. It may help to note all the pros and cons of the job you are in.

How does the job make you feel about your life and your purpose? Is the job what you want to be doing to earn a living? Are you happy? Sometimes the simplest questions are the most powerful to ask.

Whether it’s deliberating over a job, a relationship, a moving of home, remember you will always have a choice. The choice to relax and breathe rather than stress and tense up will almost always be the right decision.

Practice slow deep breathing in the face of difficult situations. Control your breathing, tame your mind, and step forward with confidence.

With love and gratitude,



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